So I, like many other curious men, decided to download and experiment (just once just to see if I like it) with Fury. When I learned I could make my character look like a gay, blond Aladdin, I couldn't wait to explore more of this whole new world of shining, shimmering, splendor. Now, I've never played an MMO previous to WoW (frankly I'm too baller), so I don't know how much of WoW's UI and Interface is original and how much is bitten from previous genre games -- however, the interface in Fury is near identical to WoW. If you're looking to combine the WoW UI with creepy dreams of nailing the Prince of Persia, you won't be disappointed or alone; minutes after loading out of the training mode I was surrounded by a harem of androgynous Arab looking boys ready for some HARDCORE combat.Now, lots of people hide their obsession with WoW -- you probably want to get a girl's number before you mention that you're 2300 in all 3 brackets. (Although...) But honestly, WoW is silly, cartoon-y, and fun and hardly anyone is creepy RP mode. When the voice in Fury started talking about my essences and my warrior-ness, I turned down my speakers. My walls are pretty soundproof and my immediate neighbor is a fat, Indian premed -- I couldn't take the chance though. I panicked and looked for anything to cover the voice -- porn, music, episodes of the OC on my laptop. In the end, it was the perfect soundtrack for my first hours of Unleashing the Fury, if by 'unleashing the fury' you mean whacking shitty training dummies with boring uninspired "special" moves while cursing the sluggish movement.
Training and messing around with abilities is fun, but it doesn't get me any closer to finding Abu. I decided to look for people to own with my "Death Magic" that my class trainer hooked me up with it. However, it appeared that nobody was actually playing the game and instead was complaining nonstop in chat about technical issues. I scoffed at their inferior gaming systems and female character models, "More like testicle issues" I chuckled and explained that while they dealt with their "woman's problems" I was about to do some unleashing of fury.
It's hard to describe how fun and complex the combat system in Fury is because it is in fact not a combat system, but instead the STD syphilis. (baidoku for my nihonjins) And no, I don't mean that the system is contagious or addictive. (syphilis is addictive?) I mean that, if you were a dude, and Fury was a woman, I wouldn't fuck her with your dick. You spam crappy low rank abilities (with a global cooldown thank you) until you save up enough to use your powerful moves a few times consecutively and hope to god you finish them off. (Oh yeah) If they don't finish, err you don't finish them, you can heal yourself up slowly and try again in a few minutes.
So for all you hardcore WoW PvPers who want:
- More RP
- Shiny blond hair (Maybe WLK will give you glowing hair, we'll see)
- Sluggish gameplay
- Homo-eroticism
** UPDATE FOR THE HATERS BECAUSE I <3 YOU **
I SEE YOU TROLLIN'
THEY HATIN'
AND POSTIN'
THEY TRYIN' CATCH ME BLOGGING NERDY
THEY HATIN'
AND POSTIN'
THEY TRYIN' CATCH ME BLOGGING NERDY
86 comments:
LOL HOT
Not funny
Sounds like this game should be the staple in FH
haha i lold!
Awesome radi <3
Baller raddy
lol nice one raddy, you mong! :D
Sadly, raddy, you're wrong :(
So do you seriously hate fury or is this a joke?
ROFL
Haha, AWESOME.
ownage rad
<3 ya rad
I SEE YOU TROLLIN'
THEY HATIN'
AND POSTIN'
THEY TRYIN' CATCH ME BLOGGING NERDY
When Fury becomes big you'll regret this post.
LMAO you have got to be drunk
zzz if I hadn't heard such good things about the game I'd probably be in the same boat as rad.
been on the game for like 2 hours total so far and it's essentially impossible to play, 0 games up ever. willing to give it a chance because i'm pretty sure the servers are just unstable as fuck atm, but they'd better get their shit together before september 15th.
gay aladdin = hot
yea, i'm sure he's going to regret typing up something up about a video game
the game is decent at best at its current state.
horrible horrible hardware problems and other stuff that just makes it annoying to play.
"It's hard to describe how fun and complex the combat system in Fury is because it is in fact not a combat system, but instead the STD syphilis. (baidoku for my nihonjins) And no, I don't mean that the system is contagious or addictive. (syphilis is addictive?) I mean that, if you were a dude, and Fury was a woman, I wouldn't fuck her with your dick. You spam crappy low rank abilities (with a global cooldown thank you) until you save up enough to use your powerful moves a few times consecutively and hope to god you finish them off. (Oh yeah) If they don't finish, err you don't finish them, you can heal yourself up slowly and try again in a few minutes."
Fantastic lol
John - too bad all the best WoW players are already on Fury. Have fun with the WoW rejects.
Ignore anonymous rad, this post was fresh and comedic, and I at least took the intention as a funny evaluation rather than rabble-rousing and trying to stir up controversy.
Great write-up, gonna link your "review" to some of my friends who (tried to) play fury.
Hilarious commentary on your experience in Fury. Haven't really read many other blogs about the game but every Fury fanboi seems to hate you now. Congrats on pissing off 7 people.
"John - too bad all the best WoW players are already on Fury."
lol wow have you even played fury
Zarthustra - they are.
Lol fanboys
They tanken it serious
Gj raddy !
and i was just about to DL it =X
thanks for saving me bandwidth i guess :P
haha awesome
also rofl at ppl getting pissed off for this
"When Fury becomes big you'll regret this post." hahahaha, seriously dude!
"Zarthustra - they are."
I've been on Fury twice now, as I mentioned, and every time there have been 0 queues. I've seen one blog by a top WoW pvp'er, Kintt, and everyone else has been really silent about it. I think the game *might* have potential, but to say that all the top WoW PvP'ers have jumped ship is an overstatement.
They havent jumped ship, but I've seen Kintt, Vhell, Zecks, and there's a whole guild called bg9 (:-P). I've heard the technical problems are horrid, and the servers are ludicrously unstable (they crash about once an hour), but it runs fine in low-render mode on my machine which is several years old. The lower ranks (levels) are kind of boring, since people can easily outheal your damage and you don't have a lot of stuff you can do. However, higher ranks are very fun, and require coordination to take down organized/semi-organized teams since healing is so ridiculous (my overlord has 4 different healing debuffs, and it still takes me about 2 minutes to kill a healer:-P).
Anyway, its 9000x faster pace than WoW, and if they ever fix their enormous mountain of technical issues it'll be a really fun game. I doubt it will be a WoW killer, but instead just a nice passtime between arena games.
haha that was epic..
Anyway i tried the game aswell and I for once did not select the Aladin gayboy no i went with a redhead lesbo.
But after started the gaming and began strafíng backwards the character makes a move even more shameful than my human mage's casting animation.
When you run backwards it looks like you are riverdancing - so i ran around riverdancing for 10 min and called it aday. Next time i want to get another dance session ill log in again.
First couple levels of PvP are pretty lame, but it takes off pretty quickly.
Regardless, this post owned.
Nice post Raddy... very comical indeed. LOL @ blonde gay
I love this article!
-isolololololol
SO awesome LOL
Very funny, I haven't read any satire as well written as that for some time. I laughed out loud repeatedly.
Hahaha hilarious stuff! Keep it up raddy ;)
Dear Radickle
What an eloquently written essay I have just read. Your use of satirical admonition and invigorating controversy really brings the reader in, as if to say, "I've got you now, there's no going back." The furor and fervor portrayed in your writings are truly remarkable.
10/10
Would read it again.
Yeah the first levels do suck pretty hard. It starts to pick up once you hit Disciple. They really need to fix the hardware issues. I don't fully load into games until 30-40 seconds after the battle has started, and my laptop isn't even a year old. Also I don't know how you guys aren't finding games. You must be queuing up for the wrong warzone type.
Best post ever, hahah.
Tried to play but my toaster comp couldn't handle it :(
Believe what you want, the overwhelming response from people whose opinions matter has been that the game is awesome, even if it is plagued with server instability and bugs (which should be expected in beta).
This is pretty much what it was like in the early days of WoW on SS-EU.
i just want to be your friend rad.
will you be my friend
I LOVE U RADDY! AWESOME POST
I didn't really mind Fury. Aside from current lack of content outside of the pvp queue zones, and technical issues it was fun.
But this is just comedy genius. eProps.
can't help but be amused by all the "waaa waaa you insulted my game i don't like you anymore" oh no dear god....someone has a different opinion on a game to you.....whatever shall you do
pathetic pieces of shit
"overwhelming response from people whose opinions matter has been that the game is awesome"
lolling at this elitism
Few complaints about the game itself actually stem from the server instability or client performance issues, which will undoubtedly be alleviated in time. Having actually played the game a bit now, I can say that it is very, very fun. But the only reason I found out that it is so enjoyable is that I'm considerably more resilient than Joe-User, as the game is about as noob friendly as Adobe Premiere. Most people who check out the game in its current state are going to tag it as boring, simple, repetitive, and uninteresting (much like Rad) because the game does a piss poor job of guiding a person through its initial stages.
you have no argument, or the closest you've come is some sort of ad-hominem. If you want to say the game is unattractive to random tards who pick it up - go ahead, but its still a better competitive game than wow and is vastly deeper and more skill based. There's nothing inherently wrong with elitism, especially given 'Joe-User's opinion is worth about as much as a handful of warm shit when it comes to judging whether or not a game is good.
and im sure your so amazing
Very lulzy article, some good jokes in there! :O
so your playing fury cause you heard good players are too and you think that makes you good. grats
"you have no argument"
k, I'll spell it out for you~
An MMO's success isn't relative to the number of hardcore players. It's success is entirely reliant on casual, "Joe User" type players that you're so eager to spurn. Without the casuals, there is no competitive Fury, and right now the game is as desirable as a handful of warm shit to the people that it needs to survive. This is, as I mentioned previously, due to the poorly designed opening stages of the game.
I'm really enjoying Fury at the moment, and want to see it succeed. It's going to have a hard time doing so if they don't make it more accessible to the people who matter.
For a gay like me, this game is a dream come true (or should i say cum true). I love the artwork, and the muscle textures. I literally blew 3 loads in the first hour i played the game. I don't know how all you straighties can pvp so much with all these high-definition ripped guys running around, i just can't control myself.
I will be getting my boyfriends to play with me and maybe setup an RP guild.
EPIC POST RADDY!
Best post yet raddy
Gay jokes make you cool and mature
"I see you trollin' ..." was omgeese
I've read this post too many times.
It's too damn brilliant.
Gay jokes are the tamest thing to come out of rad I think LOL
You should hear his kid IRL
"I will be getting my boyfriends to play with me and maybe setup an RP guild. "
And here I thought RP was just for smelly nerds that live in their basement....of the breeding variety.
I liked Fury. I might be a closet gay !
Seriously though, I was able to play some real PvP (capture the flag type stuff), and I thought it was a lot more fun than WoW.
Hilarious post though.
Funny post. Love your style.
You guys take Raddy way too seriously haha
You only do goofy posts every blue moon but they are fantastic. I very much like Fury so far but you sarcastically and comedically point out some of the idiosyncrasies and frustrating things about Fury.
/signed
I loled.. several different times
just epic
Raddi,
"I mean that, if you were a dude, and Fury was a woman, I wouldn't fuck her with your dick. "
I will leave you with this advice a friend of mine once gave me:
"Pussy has no face"
Epic Post IMO.
I don't know if the comments or the article was more funny LMAO
It probably means something that your posts with the most replies are always your comedic ones. Have you considered that people are not interested in strategy articles for one class very much?
I'll accept it when more than some random anon tells me it with less sincerity than most of the ym jokes on bg9 irc are delivered with.
and when said person's opinion is worth shit. which yours isn't :>
bg 9 rofl.
Anon wrote
"It probably means something that your posts with the most replies are always your comedic ones. Have you considered that people are not interested in strategy articles for one class very much? "
If I wanted comedy I'd go DL something British. I came here for in-depth strat discussion and a perspective on pvp that I can respect, even if I disagree with certain things.
The humor articles are great, but only because they are not the ordinary fare.
Fury is utter trash. It's like they tried to rip off the PvP from Guild Wars (a great PvP game) but without knowing what the hell they were doing, or having a competent dev or design team.
Instead of the GW adrenaline mechanic (think WoW warrior rage), they basically have 4 separate adrenaline counters for the 4 elements, which really don't make things any more fun. Yay innovation.
Do me rad. Take me hard and take me now.
LMAO
Fury blows
Useless opinion from someone who knows nothing about the game. Way to ruin your popularity rad.
rad have u seen ayrll 2?
i think its pretty nice and well played..
http://www.warcraftmovies.com/movieview.php?id=42554
LOL... that was hilarious.
The comments are pretty good too... I especially liked "Illexiyel's".
" Dear Radickle
What an eloquently written essay I have just read. Your use of satirical admonition and invigorating controversy really brings the reader in, as if to say, "I've got you now, there's no going back." The furor and fervor portrayed in your writings are truly remarkable."
The best part is how he/she mocks your style of humor, and then calls you "Radickle"... NICE ONE ILLEXIYAL... so much more clever than Raddy's jokes!
Is the joke the article or Kzn?
No, the joke is fanboys like you, who put even Ming's to shame.
Hide behind anonymity more.
I'm not fanboy of anybody -- you're just out of line and a general douchebag in all these posts. You play the victim but you provoke everyone into attacking you by acting so condescending.
Apologies to rad who is just trying to entertain.
No, you're a fanboy. And apparently mounting reasonable arguments and pointing out how other people's reasoning is flawed = condescending.
Right, ok, I'll continue being condescending.
"I wouldnt fuck her with your dick" hahahah nice one :D
btw I hope you aint right, else I have wasted a lot of time dl'ing this :)
There are some amazingly comments in here LOL
Fury still going strong KZN?
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