Well My Bubble Burst

All over your face.

And chest.

Let's stir it around together and then feel guilty and cry.

No sweet 2.4 retarded buffs. Yet.

Ain't got no words really. Reckon there ain't a need.

That note about Druid Subtlety now affecting Natural Perfection did incite some temporary nerdrage, but it has now subsided. Replaced by a general boredom that even the most frisky of lesbian porn cannot abate. By the way, have you noticed that 1 girl + 1 girl does not equal 2, nor even 3, but infinity? I've derived the equation for said phenomenon. Well, more of a step by step evolution really. Think pikachu to raichu but with way more nipples. Less zapping though. Way less.


Don't even think about turning that into your math professor. Shit is plagiarism and I will prosecute to the full extent of the law. On the whole lesbian porn topic, does anyone else have a serious problem with strap-on mock oral? Like who are we kidding here. What's the fucking point? Especially when the receiver really gets into it. I think it's pretty much the equivalent of watching a girl tie a guy's shoes. Fuck, wow, yeah. You're doing a great job. Just like that. Over. Under. In. And. Out. FUCK I'M SPENT.

Holy shit, shoe-tying is pretty hot. Fuck using basketball players to sell shoes. Insert some sort of balls, rim, and hoop joke here. Oh, fuck you. Yeah. You.

Really the whole 2.4 thing would be no big deal if we weren't all moist from the rumored changes. Which had something like this effect...

[Guild] [Radikal]: OMG MAGES ARE NOW WARLOCKS
[Guild] [Radikal]: LOLOL 10% MITIGATION + 5% EXTRA PHYSICAL EAT A DICK WARRIOR DEFENSIVE STANCE HAHAHAHAHA
[Guild] [OtherWarrior]: Cool game.
[Officer] [Mekasha]: The weird thing was that although her blood was delicious, it really wasn't that warm.
[Guild] [Radikal]: HEY LOCKS UR ALL FAGS HAHA KY
[Guild] [PvELock]: ...
[Guild] [Suck] : Why did mages need buffs anyway?
[Guild] [Radikal]: I LIKE ONCE LOST A GAME OF 2S AND THEREFORE THE GAME WAS WRONG THATS WHY
[Guild] [Parrot]: It's true. Mages are underrepresented in arenas.
[Guild] [Radikal]: THATS CUZ THEY ALL SUX PP AND NEED TO BE MORE LIKE ME
[Guild] [Radikal]: IM LIKE THE MAGE HERO CLASS. CLASS: GOD
[Guild] [Suck]: What?
[Officer] [Mekasha]: And like halfway through, she tells me "I'm not even a hooker."
[Guild] [Radikal]: SEE THE OTHER MAGES ARE LIKE PIKACHU BUT IM RAICHU SON IM EVOLVED ZAPP BITCH GET FUCKING ZAPPED YOU LIKE THAT NOW FUCKING KY IM OUT PEACE

Okay, that's twice with the pikachu-raichu thing but I just tell it like it is. If you can't handle my pokemon, bitch best stay in your ball, nah mean? (No, not pokemen you motherfuckers)

Speaking of things that glow orange, I was thinking more of Jessica Alba and her permanent fake tan glory. I said I no longer wanted in it, but perhaps that was hasty. While the thought of her being a MILF still confuses me, I would like to use the powers of the interweb to immortalize a quick apology for my needlessly hurtful prior comments:

Jessica, I'm sorry. I want to prove to you that I'm a good person and still think you're really hot. Even if when I look at you, I see the opening to The Hills Have Eyes 2. Because I know that even if I'm scared, you'd be there with me and well, c'mon, fucking Sin City.

And I want you to know that I'm good with kids. I'm responsible. Great with kids really. I know it's not all bacon grease baths and trips to the tiger pit at the zoo. That tiger's just growling because he's scared. Just remember cute Tigger and go for the little ones! The point is that I'd be there for him/her/it and I'd be there for you, and what I'm really trying to say is, it would make this blogger the luckiest man in the blogosphere if you'd take my hand -- Jessica Alba, will you marry me? (You can ditch that other dude, he's lame and perhaps less famous than me)

THE END

ZAPPPPP